MOV Parent: Things to say – and avoid saying – to your kids
Trending
I told you before, I only write on the Parent page once a month, and it seems like the days fly by so fast.
As we all know, children are so important in our lives. When a couple is united in marriage, what is the first priority on their agenda? To have a little baby. And some have one, two or three more, and I call them blessings.
Those little angels don't stay babies very long, nor toddlers. Before we know it, they start going to school, they become adults, they get married and they have children of their own. At this point, your family multiplies, but guess what? So do your responsibilities and also the worries. You have more people to be concerned about.
I loved all their ages when my children were growing up. I was praying they would stay young forever, but then I couldn't wait to have grandchildren and I did the same thing. But now all my grandchildren are growing up - four of them in college, three in high school and one in junior high. What do I do now?
As parents and grandparents here are some facts that we need to know and tell our kids as well:
To build up and promote self-esteem, tell them you know you can trust them and they always will do their best.
Tell them they have a loving heart, and are becoming an incredible, kind person. Tell them their heart is full of love, and they make good decisions.
At times as parents, we feel bad when we punish our children, but it is always for their own good. Deep inside we do it for them because we care for them and we need to give them unconditional love.
Let's tell our kids they need to obey and be nice.
At times, kids say things that we don't always agree with, and usually they say it while they're in front of other people because they know they can get by with it.
Don't forget, kids remember the way you treat them, how much you praised their effort. Your kids learn love by watching love and building up relationships.
The time you spend with them is very important, how you listen to them and how you handle stress. Absence builds insecurity. It's very important to know that kids miss their parents, even if they don't tell us.
Please don't say the following things to your children:
* Big boys/girls don't cry.
* You're lazy.
* You are the reason I'm stressed.
* Why can't you be like your siblings? (Don't compare your children.)
* I will never forgive you. (Please, don't ever say that to them. Someday, you will be sorry.)
* You're too sensitive. (It teaches them to ignore their feelings.)
* Because I said so. (That teaches them fear, not understanding.)
* You're always messing things up. (These words stick with them longer than you think.)
I know all of the above is easier said than done, but if we can all practice a little bit at a time, hopefully we will make a difference!
Till next month.