(Life Through the Lens - Photo Illustration/MetroCreativeConnection)

“But, sometimes, bad stuff just happens.”

***

In the not-too-distant-future of 2091, life persists. It waivers … but it persists. Despite the steady decline of the environment, the ever-roiling dysfunction of human politics, the tug of war of control, huMANity has dug his heels in and, doggonit, persisted. There are few things in life quite as stubborn as huMANity.

Hu(wo)manity has had enough, though. Around 2088, she experienced her final disappointment. The discrimination, the degradation, the widespread disrespect … not to mention the incessant high-fiving and “dude-bro-sports-talk.” With change always promised yet never quite enacted, hu(wo)manity took matters into her own beautifully proportioned yet immensely strong hands: she simply left. She packed her things and left…

…and she didn’t even leave a forwarding address!

At first, the reality seemed a bit indigestible to huMANity. It was brushed off as erratic, overly-emotional, and a bold-yet-futile gesture to get huMANity to admit some mysterious wrongdoing. Well, huMANity wasn’t about to admit anything — not in this lifetime! HuMANity, as is his habit, stomped a bit harder throughout the house, but continued in his daily routine, not allowing a little thing like this to disrupt his already busy schedule.

As the years wore on, it was pretty clear that hu(wo)manity was gone for good. The disbelief turned to anger. “You know what? Good! She was holding me back!” Every restaurant was turned into a sports bar, fist bumps became the new global currency, and every argument was solved by physical dominance. Aggression replaced empathy. Denial choked out dialogue. Every movie was a sequel or spinoff of the Fast and Furious franchise.

By 2091, civilization had regressed into barbaric clans, each only as powerful as the size of the garbage heap he patrolled. Communication denigrated into grunts and carefully timed middle fingers. Any whispered desire for the lost power of hu(wo)manity was quickly squashed … like literally. Sensitivity would not be tolerated.

As dawn approached this particularly fetid Friday, a subtle yet serious problem presented itself: The sky was falling. HuMANity groaned, “Good! It was too high anyway.” The sky continued its decline to no resistance – huMANity had nothing left to preserve or protect. Instead of punching the sky, as was huMANity’s natural reflex, they just reclined their chairs a bit more and watched the crushing descent of the world’s once-distant ceiling.

The Earth, once full of heights and mountains and buildings, was methodically laid low. Flattened. Squashed. The sky is no respecter of biceps or bank accounts. Wherever hu(wo)manity wound up, I can hear her voice right now, echoing off the eerily even and empty Earth: “I guess they forgot that women hold up half the sky.”

***

“If I Had Legs, I’d Kick You,” directed by Mary Bronstein.

Life is increasingly difficult for Linda (Rose Byrne). Her chosen profession as a psychotherapist is increasingly difficult, the clientele bringing more stress than she can manage. Her husband’s job as a naval captain means he is gone for weeks or months at a time, his telephone communications often growing so impatient that arguments are unavoidable. Her daughter has a chronic pediatric illness that necessitates a feeding tube and daily hospital visits, improvement seeming impossible to see and discouraging to discuss.

When Linda’s apartment floods, the literal ceilings collapsing in on her, she is forced to move into a grungy motel with her sick daughter in tow. Sleep proves impossible — the new setting, the inherent stress, the feeding pump, the marital distance, the work disappointments — so Linda takes up questionable behaviors to cope, even leaving her child alone at this shady spot for hours. When the daughter’s doctor demands progress, both from the patient and from Linda’s care, Linda’s stress reaches a new stratosphere; she does not feel the increase is possible and resents the implications of her effort not meeting the highest of standards. How could she do more?

Director/writer Mary Bronstein has created a small-time emotional masterpiece. It is urgent and impassioned. Bronstein’s writing is natural yet motivated; the directing is innovative and unafraid. The acceptance of the internal is truly striking! The cinematography by Christopher Messina aids Bronstein’s vision – the art direction by Kyra Boselli and special effects by Damian Fisher bring that vision to life.

Byrne delivers the performance of her career! She is heartbreaking and exceedingly earnest! A$AP Rocky is entertaining as James, the temporary motel friend. Christian Slater is a welcome sight as the husband Charles. Conan O’Brien is such a fun surprise as Therapist.

“If I Had Legs, I’d Kick You” is a surreal dream of consequence and care. It can be streamed right now on HBO Max.

REPORT CARD

Grade: A.

Assessment: A soul-shaking glimpse at motherhood.

***

“Sorry, Baby,” directed by Eva Victor.

It all begins innocently: Agnes (Eva Victor) is a hardworking and extremely talented English student at a liberal arts college in New England; she excels and is praised for her limitless future. When she begins to garner extra attention from her favorite and renowned professor, Agnes feels finally seen and valued.

Then “the bad thing” happens…and Agnes instantly changes: her confidence is shot, her comfort is stolen, and her conscience is muddied. She is still highly intelligent and professionally successful … but she isn’t the same Agnes as before “the thing.”

The film follows Anges in the years after, how “the bad thing” continues to affect her every decision and action. Her perception, her trust, her boundaries, her ambition, her habits, all the way down to how she speaks to a baby. She will forever carry this “thing.”

Victor has never written or directed a movie before … and yet her movie is full of conviction, precision and maturity. Victor’s directing is minimal in the best way possible; the writing is overflowing with compassion and control. I am always amazed when an artist can walk such a thin line between light and heavy – it is one of film’s most mesmerizing balancing acts. The composition by Lia Ouyang Rusli is simple yet masterfully effective.

Victor, along with writing/directing, is also the movie’s star; she does a great job bringing her words and ideas to life. Her deadpan sense of humor shines through in even the heaviest moments. John Carroll Lynch plays a crucial few minutes as Pete, the sandwich guy; his gravitas was needed greatly. Lucas Hedges gives a wonderful turn as Gavin, the sensitive neighbor-turned-intimate.

Overall, it is 2025’s sleeper. No budget, no name, no hype = poignant and fresh. “Sorry, Baby” can be streamed right now on HBO Max.

REPORT CARD

Grade: A+.

Assessment: A spirit-affirming glimpse at life after trauma.