MOV Parent: What can we learn from COVID-19?
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COVID is a term that is full of meaning for all of us now. The response to the pandemic has caused us all to wonder if the cure was worse than the disease. The COVID shutdown hasn't been all bad, right? Is there a silver lining to this dark cloud hanging over us? It depends on how we respond. Charles Swindoll captured this thought well in the following quote: "I am convinced that life is 10% what happens to me and 90% how I react to it." In this "Time of COVID" the question we need to answer is: What can I learn from COVID?
We do what we value, and we value what we do --unless you are prevented from doing it. An answer to what we can learn from COVID comes by looking at what we do during the shutdown time. What we value is also revealed by our spending habits. As I've mentioned earlier there has been an increase in alcohol consumption and binge watching of TV due to COVID. There's also the "COVID 19" weight gain --the 19 referring to the pounds added to our bodies. On the flip side, there are curious shortages of certain items at the stores now; Yeast, for instance. More people are baking and cooking at home, and rediscovering the wonderful benefits of making home-cooked meals. There's also a shortage of bicycles and workout equipment, indicating that people are wanting to stay fit and healthy while in isolation. Some people are stockpiling guns and ammo, others are stockpiling board games and buying items for home improvement projects. What we buy reveals what we value.
Massive change in our community, work and family patterns required us to adapt. We've had to find new ways to celebrate things like graduations and weddings. What have you learned from your own responses to this pandemic crisis? Did you find resilient ways to grow through this, or just find avoidant ways to cope and distract yourself? Its not too late to put down the Twinkie, turn off Netflix, and get a new strategy. This is the time to reprioritize and get your life in line with what is truly important. I've observed that many families have rediscovered their back yards. Kids are seen playing outdoors, fishing and biking more than ever. It kind of reminds me of summers when I was a kid.
Let me suggest some questions to help you clarify your values. Imagine you only had two minutes to get your three most valued possessions before everything else you owned disappeared. What did you pick and why? If you could buy more time, what would you do with it? Since you can't buy that time, how are you going to make time for those things that are important to you? Are you behaving like the person want to be, or are you far removed from how you want to be? What changes to family life have you enjoyed during the COVID shutdown? How will you continue these once everything "opens up" again? Have you noticed that you or your family were too busy? What has COVID taught you about what's important to you? Life is like a road; When detours are unavoidable then try to enjoy the scenery.
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Patrick Ward, Ph.D., is a marriage and family therapist in Parkersburg. Visit his website at patrickwardphd.com